Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
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