There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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