It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
