I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
