Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize
