Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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