Please, let me fuck your mom
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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