Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
