"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
