You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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