The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
