If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I think your dad took our porno
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Randomize
