smell my finger.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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