i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Randomize
