I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
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