he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize