At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Randomize