Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Randomize
