Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
