Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
