She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
