You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize