fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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