hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
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Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
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my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
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