I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize