Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
