Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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