I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I made him laugh his dick is mine
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.