what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
it glows. i had to have it.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize