Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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