Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
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