I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
