your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I want to have your abortion
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Randomize
