It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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