If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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