i don't like sucking hair
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
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