The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
