I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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