There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
he thought i was a dude.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Randomize
