Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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