OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
