This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Randomize
