playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
