omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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