We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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