Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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