It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
