Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize