He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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