I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
